What does the rise of Jesus have to do with bunnies pooping eggs? Find out here.
What only a small selection of people have figured out: Jesus's friend Peter? He was a bunny. Because Jesus was not above making friends with small furry mammals, he was just above making friends with poor, dead-eyed fish. Of course Peter wasn't the only one of Jesus's friends that came from the animal kingdom: Wait till I tell you about Judas!
But that's a story for another day.
Anyway. Jesus and his friends had been walking through the desert for many-a-day, because Jesus liked to use the desert as inspiration for his similes. The hot, feverish climate helped him stay focused on them. Well, he and his friends were very much low on nutrients. Some of them started to show signs of illness and hallucination. One saw God, even though Jesus explained very patiently, that it wasn't God at all, there was in fact nothing there, and Jesus would know coz he knows his own dad. The guy still saw God and had a chat with him. He invited him to dinner, but God declined.
That was when Jesus knew that it was time to take action. His idea was to produce fruits or vegetables, something with a lot of water in them. He asked Peter to help him. He looked at Peter and he spoke to God, and it wasn't more than a minute later that Peter excused himself. He hid behind a bush. Another minute later and Peter hopped forwards, embarrassed, flinging a white egg in front of him with his nose.
There were a lot of uuhs and aaahs from the group, but Jesus wasn't very content. Not only did one of his best friends have to excuse himself every few minutes, which made him a poor conversation partner, the thirst for water was still greater than their hunger. So he spoke to God again.
A few minutes later, Peter brought forward another egg. But this time, it was brown.
"Are you sure that's food?", Jesus asked with a frown.
Peter nodded and held the egg up with his paw.
The egg started to melt.
It was liquid chocolate.
This is the story of how Jesus and his friends survived the brutal heat of the desert, thank God.
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